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Day of Reckoning
Day of Reckoning
Insights on the editorial process. Also, a metaphor.
0Literary fiction
Joan Adsit (United States)
~~Day of Reckoning
It’s poised above her, this instrument of destruction. The day of reckoning has come, and the edges of her pages tremble. She’s known this day would arrive, but she’s sought to block out its inevitability.
She recalls a time before the knowledge of this day’s approach, when she first was breathed to life. She’d reveled in each unfurling phrase, flexing new clauses with wonder. Blooming, soaring, exulting—words, words, words. Things she’s never seen but has felt as they scrawled across her pages in black ink and the Author’s flowery script. Each new one brought joy at its penning, evidence of His love for her etched in every line, and she cherishes them.
Now she flutters as this new weapon threatens. Its first touches against her pale complexion are surprisingly harmless—more a caress washing away a smudge than the horrid hacking and sawing she anticipates. Red ink scratches out a repeated word. A homonym is replaced by its counterpart.
But she knows this is not the end of it. Red will flow before this reckoning is complete, like blood spilling across her.
Tap, tap, tap. The pen drums against the desk—careful consideration being given to which limbs will be amputated and which sins shorn away.
She cringes as a swipe wipes away a whole sentence. No, not that one! She knows it’s not good, but she clings to it nonetheless; it’s a part of her. Adverbs follow in its wake, sliced away without mercy. Please, no! She needs them.
A comma becomes a period, and with that simple act a sentence is broken apart, divorced at the decree of the red pen.
No part of her is left unexamined. She is laid naked, and shame boils in her as the judgements continue to come: too Mary Sue, show/don’t tell, and overwrought.
New words take shape in the blank space between lines, adding to her and redefining her. She’s not ready to change, she thinks, but once it’s done she wonders how she ever existed without these bits, these details that enlarge her. She never realized how incomplete she was until she was remolded and reformed.
At last, the pen comes to rest on the desk beside her, almost as if it’s tired and used up. There is a sigh of satisfaction from the Editor; he’s pleased with this new version of her.
She examines the places where pieces and parts have been removed. She doesn’t find the open wounds and bleeding stumps she expects. Indeed, each is healed over with fresh new skin. She flexes first one newly formed paragraph and then another. Remarkable. She’s lighter, as though dead excesses have dropped away. Cleaner. Sharper. Fresher. And she knows this was how she was intended to be all along.
Why did she fear this day? Why did she flutter her pages and whimper in despair? Why, when she knows the Author and the Editor are the same? Did she think the One who so lovingly gave her life would have anything but goodwill in this winnowing? Why was she afraid of the red blood’s cleansing? Did she not realize the true sacrifice was not her own?
It’s poised above her, this instrument of destruction. The day of reckoning has come, and the edges of her pages tremble. She’s known this day would arrive, but she’s sought to block out its inevitability.
She recalls a time before the knowledge of this day’s approach, when she first was breathed to life. She’d reveled in each unfurling phrase, flexing new clauses with wonder. Blooming, soaring, exulting—words, words, words. Things she’s never seen but has felt as they scrawled across her pages in black ink and the Author’s flowery script. Each new one brought joy at its penning, evidence of His love for her etched in every line, and she cherishes them.
Now she flutters as this new weapon threatens. Its first touches against her pale complexion are surprisingly harmless—more a caress washing away a smudge than the horrid hacking and sawing she anticipates. Red ink scratches out a repeated word. A homonym is replaced by its counterpart.
But she knows this is not the end of it. Red will flow before this reckoning is complete, like blood spilling across her.
Tap, tap, tap. The pen drums against the desk—careful consideration being given to which limbs will be amputated and which sins shorn away.
She cringes as a swipe wipes away a whole sentence. No, not that one! She knows it’s not good, but she clings to it nonetheless; it’s a part of her. Adverbs follow in its wake, sliced away without mercy. Please, no! She needs them.
A comma becomes a period, and with that simple act a sentence is broken apart, divorced at the decree of the red pen.
No part of her is left unexamined. She is laid naked, and shame boils in her as the judgements continue to come: too Mary Sue, show/don’t tell, and overwrought.
New words take shape in the blank space between lines, adding to her and redefining her. She’s not ready to change, she thinks, but once it’s done she wonders how she ever existed without these bits, these details that enlarge her. She never realized how incomplete she was until she was remolded and reformed.
At last, the pen comes to rest on the desk beside her, almost as if it’s tired and used up. There is a sigh of satisfaction from the Editor; he’s pleased with this new version of her.
She examines the places where pieces and parts have been removed. She doesn’t find the open wounds and bleeding stumps she expects. Indeed, each is healed over with fresh new skin. She flexes first one newly formed paragraph and then another. Remarkable. She’s lighter, as though dead excesses have dropped away. Cleaner. Sharper. Fresher. And she knows this was how she was intended to be all along.
Why did she fear this day? Why did she flutter her pages and whimper in despair? Why, when she knows the Author and the Editor are the same? Did she think the One who so lovingly gave her life would have anything but goodwill in this winnowing? Why was she afraid of the red blood’s cleansing? Did she not realize the true sacrifice was not her own?
Read Reviews
Review 1:
Compelling hook?
Fresh?
Strong characters?
Entertaining?
Attention to mechanics
- The grammar, typography, sentence structure and punctuation would benefit from a further round of editing to avoid distracting from the quality of the story.
Narration and dialogue: Authentic voice
- Your characters’ voices were convincing and authentic.
Plot and pace
- Maintaining the right pace and sustaining the reader’s interest is a difficult balancing act. Are you sure all the material is relevant to the plot, setting and atmosphere? Make sure each sentence makes sense to the reader, and each paragraph moves their experience forward.
Atmosphere and description
- Your story was a feast for the senses. The atmosphere wrapped itself around me and transported me onto the page alongside your characters.
General comments from your fellow writer 1:
Vividly written, rich use of language. It took about a third of the way into the story before I realised what it was about. I'm assuming this confusion was a deliberate attempt at intrigue, but for me, I just found it disorienting and frustrating. Although once I did understand, I could really appreciate the poetry because like I said, rich use of language. Well done.Review 2:
Compelling hook?
Fresh?
Strong characters?
Entertaining?
Attention to mechanics
- You demonstrate a professional quality of writing throughout the story.
Narration and dialogue: Balance
- Your story struck a good balance between narration and authentic dialogue.
Narration and dialogue: Authentic voice
- Your characters’ voices were convincing and authentic.
Characterization
- Your characters were multidimensional. I found them believable and engaging and they genuinely responded to the events of the story.
Main character
- Your protagonist exhibited a unique voice and had original characteristics. Their actions and dialogue were convincing.
Character conflict
- Your characters drew me into their world from the very beginning. Their goals and conflicts were clearly conveyed.
Plot and pace
- Maintaining the right pace and sustaining the reader’s interest is a challenging balancing act. The story had a clear and coherent progression with a structured plot.
Suspense and conflict
- The joy of reading often lies in the element of suspense prompted by internal or external conflicts. Think about the conflict and tension in your story. How effectively has it been introduced?
Technique and tight writing
- The writing was tight and economical and each word had purpose. This enabled the plot to unravel clearly. Your writing exhibits technical proficiency.
Point of view
- The story successfully solicited the reader’s empathy through the clever use of the narrator's point of view. You show great deftness in handling point of view.
Style and originality
- I loved your fresh approach. Creating a unique writing style while maintaining quality of prose requires both skill and practice.
Atmosphere and description
- Your story was a feast for the senses. The atmosphere wrapped itself around me and transported me onto the page alongside your characters.
Authentic and vivid setting
- The scene needs to be vivid and realistic in order to hold the reader’s attention. Being concise and plausible at the same time is tricky. Giving this further attention could perhaps be worthwhile.
Opening line, paragraph and hook
- Great stories, nowadays, start with a powerful opening line and compelling hook in order to keep the reader engaged. Have you baited the reader enough?
Review 3:
Compelling hook?
Fresh?
Strong characters?
Entertaining?
Attention to mechanics
- You demonstrate a professional quality of writing throughout the story.
Main character
- Your protagonist exhibited a unique voice and had original characteristics. Their actions and dialogue were convincing.
Character conflict
- Your characters drew me into their world from the very beginning. Their goals and conflicts were clearly conveyed.
Plot and pace
- Maintaining the right pace and sustaining the reader’s interest is a challenging balancing act. The story had a clear and coherent progression with a structured plot.
Suspense and conflict
- The joy of reading often lies in the element of suspense prompted by internal or external conflicts. The build-up was intriguing and I felt the tension mounting with each word.
Technique and tight writing
- The writing was tight and economical and each word had purpose. This enabled the plot to unravel clearly. Your writing exhibits technical proficiency.
Style and originality
- I loved your fresh approach. Creating a unique writing style while maintaining quality of prose requires both skill and practice.
Atmosphere and description
- Your story was a feast for the senses. The atmosphere wrapped itself around me and transported me onto the page alongside your characters.
Opening line, paragraph and hook
- Great stories, nowadays, start with a powerful opening line and compelling hook in order to keep the reader engaged. Have you baited the reader enough?